Archive for the ‘Surreal Things’ Category

Mental disorders of the academic Left

Thursday, April 3rd, 2008

Prof. Shlomo ZandOne of the favorite themes of Neo-Nazis is that today’s Ashkenazi Jews aren’t Jews, that is, descendants of the inhabitants of ancient Judea, but rather descended from the Khazars, Caucasian nomads that converted to Judaism around the 7th century (some of them converted to Christianity and Islam too, but never mind).

Now an Israeli scholar, Shlomo Zand (or Sand) claims that Sephardic Jews aren’t Jews either, but descended from various North African tribes.

Zand is not a neo-Nazi, and he even admits that his ‘findings’ don’t reflect on the legitimacy of the State of Israel. However, since he believes that “the character of the State of Israel undermines it in a much more serious way”, and also that “the chances that the Palestinians are descendants of the ancient Judaic people are much greater than the chances that you or I are its descendants”, one can see that he is happy to provide ammunition to those who want an ideological foundation for their hoped-for destruction of Israel.

Zand, a historian who has heretofore written about 20th-century France, based his work on modern “studies that present unorthodox views of the origins of the Jews” (I can imagine). For a taste of the absurdity of his argument, here’s how the Jewish People was ‘invented’:

At a certain stage in the 19th century, intellectuals of Jewish origin in Germany, influenced by the folk character of German nationalism, took upon themselves the task of inventing a people “retrospectively,” out of a thirst to create a modern Jewish people. From historian Heinrich Graetz on, Jewish historians began to draw the history of Judaism as the history of a nation that had been a kingdom, became a wandering people and ultimately turned around and went back to its birthplace.

Of course the literature of the Jewish People goes back to long before this period. So Zand is apparently saying that at some point an influx of foreign DNA made the Jewish People not the the Jewish People, and therefore — knowing that they had been adulterated and therefore lost their birthright — they conspired to pretend that they were.

Even if we grant his genealogical point (which I don’t), certainly the ‘peoplehood’ of the Jews rests in culture and spirit and not physical DNA!

It’s argued that there is genetic evidence that links both Sephardic and Ashkenazi Jews to the Middle East. I’m not qualified to evaluate it, of course, but most importantly, even if many Jews were descended from converts, who cares?

I could similarly argue that many Palestinian Arabs are descended from Egyptians that came with Muhammad Ali in the early part of the 19th Century, or Syrians who migrated to Palestine when the end of Ottoman rule and Jewish development improved the regional economy. I could talk about how nobody ever heard of the ‘Palestinian people’ until 1967. But this, too, would be irrelevant.

What is relevant is that the legitimacy of the Jewish state of Israel is not dependent on the presence of converts in the genealogy of the Jews. It is not dependent on Jewish provenance in biblical times, just as it is not justified by the Holocaust.

The Early Zionists purchased land legally, often paying exorbitant prices for poor land which they then improved by draining swamps and so forth. The yishuv (pre-state Jewish settlement) built all the institutions that would become the state.

The Jewish state received international sanction in 1947 and was kept through a series of defensive wars, which in fact are still ongoing. Israel is no less ‘legitimate’ than Jordan, Iraq, Lebanon and Saudi Arabia which were created at about the same time — and possibly more so, due to the UN Partition Resolution, and the fact that Israel is a democracy.

Although religious Jews (and many Christians) believe that the Jews were given the Land as described in the Torah, there is a solid secular foundation for the state as well.

Zand’s work appears to be another manifestation of mental disorder in the extreme academic Left in Israel, similar to the completely insane thesis that the IDF’s failure to rape Arab women is a racist phenomenon.

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Brainwashing!

Tuesday, March 25th, 2008

Brainwashing!

Purim is over, and April Fool’s day has not yet arrived. So how do we explain this?

In a move to protest the IDF’s plan to send thousands of officers into the country’s schools on Wednesday, New Profile - a movement opposed to what they see as “brainwashing” by the army - plans to set up a demonstration in which members dressed as IDF officers will wash a large model of a human brain.

The organizers of the planned protest hope to draw attention to the IDF’s nationwide campaign for students and voice their opposition to the “militarization of Israeli society.”

“I think the fact that military officers have free access to schools exploits the status of soldiers and the status of schools,” said Lotahn Raz, a New Profile activist and organizer of Wednesday’s demonstration, which he called a “street performance.”

If this isn’t enough, Raz makes his satirical intent clear (to me, anyway):

“The army is a hierarchical organization,” Raz continued. “It doesn’t have respect for life, and they have no regard for the equality of women. It encourages following orders instead of individual thinking.” — Jerusalem Post

Although I’m sure it’s a put-on, let me point out a few obvious things just in case:

  • Lotahn, you live in Tel Aviv, Israel, The Middle East, and not Berkeley, California.
  • If you have a problem with the “militarization of Israeli society”, you will have to take it up with the Arabs, who are responsible for this.
  • It’s not true that the army has no respect for life, in general. Just the lives of the guys trying to kill you.
  • Yes, it’s hierarchical and they have to follow orders. Duh.

Update [26 Mar 2008 1858 PDT]: It’s not a joke! They actually held their demonstration. Here’s a picture of their ‘brain’:

New Profile's brain

I am struck dumb by the stupidity and self-delusion of these people.

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Academic: IDF dehumanizes Palestinians by not raping them

Wednesday, December 26th, 2007

What I am about to discuss is simply unbelievable. So maybe it’s made up, intended as a satire on leftist academics. You decide.

(IsraelNN.com) A research paper that won a Hebrew University teachers’ committee prize finds that the lack of IDF rapes of Palestinian women is designed to serve a political purpose.

The abstract of the paper, authored by doctoral candidate Tal Nitzan, notes that the paper shows that “the lack of organized military rape is an alternate way of realizing [particular] political goals.”

The next sentence delineates the particular goals that are realized in this manner: “In the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, it can be seen that the lack of military rape merely strengthens the ethnic boundaries and clarifies the inter-ethnic differences - just as organized military rape would have done.”

The paper further theorizes that Arab women in Judea and Samaria are not raped by IDF soldiers because the women are de-humanized in the soldiers’ eyes…

Nitzan’s paper did, however, give much space to the explanation that the Israeli soldiers refrained from rape out of demographic considerations. She explained at length how fearful the Jewish population is of the growing Arab population, and how in cases of wartime rape, the baby is generally assumed to be of the mother’s nationality.

Let me try to get my mind around this idea.

Arab propaganda for the past hundred years or so has accused Jews of raping Arab women, because of the inflammatory nature of such accusations. But despite the fact that rape in war, even mass rape as a military tactic, has characterized many recent conflicts throughout the world, there are almost zero known cases of IDF soldiers raping Palestinian women.

A normal person would think that this is a good thing which speaks well of our army. Explanations that can be offered might include Jewish religious traditions, which persist even in secular Jews, the IDF’s concept of tohar haneshek [purity of arms], etc.

But a normal person cannot understand the mind of a person so damaged by self-hatred, so infused with the viewpoint of her enemies, that she would conclude that the reason her country’s soldiers are not guilty of rape is…that they are racists!

And it doesn’t matter if IDF soldiers rape or not, because “the lack of military rape merely strengthens the ethnic boundaries and clarifies the inter-ethnic differences - just as organized military rape would have done.”

So we might as well be rapists, because the goal of raping and not-raping is the same!

Even Dr. Chomsky didn’t think of this.

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The concept of irony is inadequate to describe the UN

Thursday, September 20th, 2007

Like putting Libya in charge of the planning for the Durban II anti-racism conference, or (in 2004) electing Sudan to the Human Rights Commission while it was murdering Darfur residents, the UN continues to find ways to make one spit out one’s morning coffee:

Two weeks after Israel’s alleged bombing raid in Syria, which some foreign reports said targeted North Korean nuclear material, the UN’s nuclear watchdog [the International Atomic Energy Agency (IAEA)] elected Syria as deputy chairman of its General Conference on Monday…

The Syrian news agency SANA proudly reported the election on Tuesday, adding that Syria was also successful in including “the Israeli nuclear arsenal as an item on the agenda of the conference.” — Jerusalem Post

Here’s an honest job for the UN: condemn Hamas for committing war crimes by deliberately targeting civilian populations with rocket fire, kidnapping Gilad Shalit and refusing to allow him to meet with Red Cross representatives, etc.

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Rumors of another deal with the devil

Saturday, July 14th, 2007

If this is true, it represents a new low in Israeli self-esteem and common sense:

Israel had agreed to cease arrest raids on Fatah-affiliated fugitives in the West Bank if they proved that they were ready to stop all terror activity against the Jewish state, al-Aksa Martyrs Brigade leaders told the Palestinian Ma’an news agency on Saturday.

Reportedly, 178 Palestinian fugitives from the West Bank would no longer be sought by security forces if they proved that they had ceased terrorist activity. Martyrs Brigades Jenin chief, Zakahriya Zubeidi, was said to be one of the names on the list.

Also on the list is Daoud Haji, one of two terrorists who participated in a 2002 attack against troops at the Ein Arik checkpoint. Six soldiers were murdered in the massacre when Haji and another terrorist stormed the checkpoint shooting both soldiers on guard and those sleeping in a near-by caravan. — Jerusalem Post (my emphasis)

Note that it’s not clear what they would have to prove. It is nonsensical, anyway, to ‘prove’ that you are “ready to stop” doing anything. What constitutes proof? I know someone who has ‘proved’ that she is “ready to stop” smoking a million times, but she still smokes.

This is supposedly being done because these terrorists are the Fatah elements most “dedicated to standing up against Hamas”. I don’t need to point out that despite their differences, the one thing that they do agree with Hamas about is their desire to kill Jews.

Deals with the devil always turn out badly. Let’s hope that this report is just wishful thinking on the part of the al-Aqsa terrorists.

Update [1436 PDT]: PM Olmert has confirmed that it’s true, although a spokesperson said that Zubeidi is not included.

“The agreement serves Israel’s interests in that the Fatah men on the list will lay down their arms and leave the cycle of terror,” a senior Israeli official said. — YNet

Of course. Thank goodness.

Update [15 July 0818 PDT]: Zubeidi will be pardoned after all.

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It’s irrelevant that doctor-terrorists are Muslims, suggests British PM

Tuesday, July 3rd, 2007

This gives a new meaning to the phrase ‘health care crisis’:

Eight people arrested in connection with failed car bombings in Glasgow and London all have links with the National Health Service, the BBC has learned. Seven are believed to be doctors or medical students, while one formerly worked as a laboratory technician.

A suspect in hospital after the Glasgow attack has been named as Khalid Ahmed, who is believed to be a doctor…

Australian media have identified a man arrested at Brisbane Airport as Dr Mohammed Haneef, 27, who has worked at Halton Hospital in Runcorn, Cheshire. He was detained while trying to board a plane to India. — BBC [my emphasis]

Meanwhile, UK officials have taken the point of view that the attacks are not related to Islam:

[British Prime Minister] Gordon Brown has banned ministers from using the word “Muslim” in ­connection with the ­terrorism crisis.

The Prime Minister has also instructed his team – including new Home Secretary Jacqui Smith – that the phrase “war on ­terror” is to be dropped…

Officials insist that no direct links with Muslim extremists have been publicly confirmed by police investigating the latest attempted terror attacks. Mr Brown himself did not refer to Muslims or Islam once in a BBC TV interview on Sunday…

[Smith] said: “Let us be clear – terrorists are criminals, whose victims come from all walks of life, communities and religions. Terrorists attack the values shared by all law-abiding citizens. As a Government, as communities, as individuals, we need to ensure that the message of the terrorists is rejected.” — Daily Express, UK

Can you imagine Churchill in 1941 saying something like “the Luftwaffe pilots who are bombing us come from all walks of life, etc.” and refusing to mention Germany or Nazism?

A former homeland security spokesman said “we know that the vast majority of Muslims are not involved in terrorism and we have to accept there are sensitivities about these matters”. Are they also too dumb to understand the difference between a condemnation of radical Islamic terrorists and saying “all Muslims are terrorists”?

Thanks to Little Green Footballs for both of these links.

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BBC reporter ‘claimed’ to have intercourse with sheep

Thursday, May 31st, 2007

The BBC, missing no chance to blacken the name of Israel, has published a report speculating that the 1976 Entebbe hijacking was in part perpetrated by — are we surprised? — Israel.

BBC reporter Dan Parkinson wrote,

An unnamed contact told a British diplomat in Paris that the Israeli Secret Service, the Shin Beit [sic], and the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP) collaborated to seize the plane.

There you are, positive proof. An unnamed contact told a diplomat named D. H. Colvin that they did it in order to “torpedo the PLO’s standing in France and to prevent what they see as a growing rapprochement between the PLO and the Americans”.

ParkinsonNow I want to get this on the record: last week my brother-in-law was told by an unnamed source that he saw Dan Parkinson having sexual intercourse with a sheep.

Go ahead, Parkinson, I want to hear you deny it.

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Close Syrian election imperiled by attempted vote-tampering

Tuesday, May 29th, 2007

The Syrian ElectionA tough race which Syrian President Bashar Assad won by a majority of 97.6% (he was unopposed, of course). From MEMRI.

On wall: “A Democracy of 99%, And Even More!” On toilet paper: “Referendum.”

Source: Al-Mustaqbal, Lebanon, May 29, 2007

The following is from the Kuwait Times:

“This great consensus shows the political maturity of Syria and the brilliance of our democracy and multi-party system,” [Syrian] Interior Minister Bassam Abdel Majeed said at a news conference to declare the results. “There has been some repetition of votes but we caught them by reviewing the voting lists,” Majeed said in response to a question about the possibility of vote-tampering.

Imagine my relief!

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A completely different universe

Sunday, April 29th, 2007

MK Yossi Beilin of the left-wing Meretz party at Abie Natan’s 80th birthday party:

Beilin said that Natan’s ambitions were “closer than ever” to being realized. “All of the Arab countries are willing to make peace with us,” Beilin said. “Peace is within touching distance.”

He is not even on another planet, but in a completely different universe.

Just when you thought the UN could not get worse

Saturday, April 14th, 2007

Everyone knows about the absurdity of the UN Human Rights Council, which since its formation has passed 8 resolutions condemning Israel and none against any other nation. But it’s not the only UN body that behaves, er, strangely. Take the UN Commission on Disarmament (please):

On April 9, 2007 there was a United Nations believe-it-or-not moment extraordinaire. At the same time that Iran’s President Ahmadinejad declared his country was now capable of industrial-scale uranium enrichment, the U.N. reelected Iran as a vice chairman of the U.N. Disarmament Commission…

So in Iran at the Natanz nuclear facility Ahmadinejad gloated: “With great pride, I announce as of today our dear country is among the countries of the world that produces nuclear fuel on an industrial scale.” And in New York, courtesy of his U.N. platform, Iranian Disarmament Vice-Chairman Seyed Mohammad Ali Robatjazi railed against “noncompliance with the NPT [nuclear nonproliferation treaty] by the United States” and “the Zionist lobby”…

Following the election on Monday of Iran as vice chairman, the U.N. Disarmament Commission elected Syria as its rapporteur. — Anne Bayefsky in NRO

Yes, of course, the real problem is the Zionist lobby.

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Israelis claim refugee status in Canada

Sunday, April 8th, 2007
The Canadian citizenship and immigration department has refused an application for refugee status filed by an Israeli citizen.

(more…)

Israel funds Hamas “security” forces

Monday, March 12th, 2007

Why am I not surprised?

Some of the $100 million in tax revenues that Israel transferred to the Palestinian Authority in January went to thousands of Hamas supporters - including those in the security forces - Hamas officials said on Monday.

Meanwhile, a senior PA official in Ramallah said that Israel’s decision not to release more of the hundreds of millions of dollars in tax revenues it owes the PA undermines PA Chairman Mahmoud Abbas and his Fatah faction.

Prime Minister Ehud Olmert made the decision against releasing more of the funds last week, following reports that Abbas had broken a promise to use the revenues solely for humanitarian purposes.

“This is not a wise decision,” the official told The Jerusalem Post. “On the one hand, Israel is talking about the need to strengthen the moderates among the Palestinians. On the other hand, Israel’s decision to refrain from releasing the funds, which are estimated at nearly half a billion dollars, will weaken President Abbas and all the Palestinians who don’t support Hamas.” — Jerusalem Post

Some comments:

  • Abbas does not keep promises, either because he doesn’t want to or he is too weak. It doesn’t matter.
  • Abbas is not so moderate anyway and shouldn’t be “strengthened”.